MY LIFE

My life as a child was very sad, I felt unloved and really bad; rejection was a big issue with me I was told you had to earn love, it was not for free Growing up I felt I was dumb; I couldn’t catch on even with sums Affection was something not given to me; accept if I did something to earn it, then I would see My abuse was a burden I could hardly bare, all I could do was hurt others and swear Love to me seem so far away; no matter how hard I tried, come what may My heart grew bitter as I continued this path, and my eyes were blinded by this wrath Relationships suffered one by one, I lost all my friends and ended with none The life I led and continued to toil, what I felt was dirt from the soil I could never see my own worth; many times I wanted to leave this dark old earth Mistakes I’ve made seem so very bad; forgiveness was so far from the heart My pain was deep within myself; I felt there was no chance from the start I would never have believed that love could be received; without anything in return except me Years went by and I would cry, I felt so alone and sad It was all I could do and all I could bare; was to feel my life was in deep despair My heart cried out to my Father in Heaven; He planted a seed instead of a weed And blessed my life with His love from above; He gave me faith and something to hope for My life seem such a mess and in shatters; I never believed that it mattered He gave me my Lord as an offering; took my sin the strife and suffering I’ve now been redeemed by the blood of the lamb, safe in His hands upon this land The price was paid upon the cross; he took my suffering with my pain, he gave me hope as He was slain Now I’m saved instead of lost; He took my sin to the cross The heart I have now is overflowing with love; a gift so special given from above I cried to the Lord for someone to love; He gave me this gift from heaven with love I now have my Jesus whom I dearly love, whose heart has mine in perfect love. [Photo and poem by Natalie Price]

WHEN THE DARKNESS ROLLS ON IN

When the darkness rolls on in, like waves upon the shore All around I look to try to find an open door When my heart is just so heavy and loaded down with sin I just don’t seem to hear your voice or see you any more As the blackness overtakes me and my life seems such a mess Nothing I will do or say, it all just makes no sense And I wonder where’s the wisdom, that’s supposed to come with age And I wonder how you love me as you do I still sometimes see your beauty in the rising of the sun But the heaviness I feel inside keeps pulling me on down The cross it seems so far away, your sacrifice for me It was so long so long ago you died upon that tree I still love to sing your praises and come before your throne But sin has built a hellish wall, left me standing all alone When the tears come running down my face, I wonder who they’re for For you, for me, for Calvary, so then I cry some more And I wonder, there is no one left to turn to and no place left to go Without you I have nothing left, and nothing left to do Without you life is senseless, confusion seems to rule Without you I am all alone, without you just so small Well my road it has been rather rough, my journey’s near its end There is one thing amazes me, that You still call me friend. [Photo by Natalie Price] [Poem by Paul van Dommelen]